Rebel to Redeemed: Battling with God
Duncan* was slowly wheedling himself into my life. Several times I tried to pull back, but he and his sister, continued to push and would not leave me alone. I fell for their act that they genuinely cared for me.
However, a few months into our relationship I woke up one day in a panic. My insides felt like they were being torn apart. I took a drive through the countryside to have time to think and pray.
Instead of seeking God’s will and asking Him what He wanted, I told Him what I wanted. The more I prayed, the more my insides did battle with one another.
Finally, I said, “God I love this man and can’t live without him. I don’t care what it takes, just allow us to be together.” I had no idea at that time what I was asking, but God knew.
Six months later I found myself moving two states away to live with this man.
What I did not understand until years later was what was happening the day my insides were so tormented. There was a spiritual battle going on for my soul at that moment. I chose my selfishness and desires, instead of seeking God.
I was about to head down the broken path.