Rebel to Redeemed: Battling with God

Duncan* was slowly wheedling himself into my life.  Several times I tried to pull back, but he and his sister, continued to push and would not leave me alone.  I fell for their act that they genuinely cared for me.

Have you felt the spiritual battle being waged for you?

However, a few months into our relationship I woke up one day in a panic.  My insides felt like they were being torn apart.  I took a drive through the countryside to have time to think and pray.

Instead of seeking God’s will and asking Him what He wanted, I told Him what I wanted.  The more I prayed, the more my insides did battle with one another.

Finally, I said, “God I love this man and can’t live without him.  I don’t care what it takes, just allow us to be together.”  I had no idea at that time what I was asking, but God knew.

Six months later I found myself moving two states away to live with this man.

What I did not understand until years later was what was happening the day my insides were so tormented.  There was a spiritual battle going on for my soul at that moment.  I chose my selfishness and desires, instead of seeking God.

I was about to head down the broken path.

*Name changed