Moving from Victim to Survivor

During the process of healing, I realized that I had to move my thought process from victim to survivor. Dictionary.com describes a victim as “a person harmed, injured or killed as a result of a crime, accident, or other event or action…a person who is tricked or duped.” That is definitely true when you have been involved in a variety […]

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Knowing When to Walk Away

Have you ever had to walk away from someone you love? There are times when we have to make tough decisions. When someone we love brings physical harm or tremendous emotional pain into our lives, there are times when we have no choice but to walk away from them. This is never an easy decision to make. Only with the […]

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He Calls the Broken Hearted

Growing up in a Christian home, I knew about the love of God. I knew that he died for my sins and loved me. I had accepted Jesus into my heart when I was only five years old, but that’s not to say I always lived in a pleasing manner to my Lord, especially as an older teenager and young […]

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Abuse Can Make You Crazy

Did you know that abuse can make you crazy? A quick Google search, shows a variety of articles proving that emotional abuse can in fact lead a person to erratic behavior. This was true for me and I felt as if I were going crazy. My abuser made it all out to be my fault and even tried to make […]

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We Often Hurt Ourselves When We Hurt

When we hurt, we take it out on those that we love {and sometimes hate} the most. There are times when we hurt that we often take it out on ourselves. When I was in an abusive relationship, I dealt with the pain by taking it out on myself. While I never tried drugs, I would bite myself, over dosed […]

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Does God See My Needs?

I wondered when I left my abusive relationship if God would provide for my needs. I had no source of income at the moment and left with just the bare minimum in clothes. There are times when our needs outweigh our resources, whether they be finances, connections, education, etc. But, what I discovered is that if I would keep my […]

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Do you enable others?

Time after time I hear stories of how family members and friends have enabled those that are hurting. The person hurting often becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol or is abusive. However, there loved ones have no idea how to stop this destructive path. Our society is full of examples of this and no better example can be found than […]

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Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers

  When I was in my abusive situation, I called out to God for three years. At times, I wondered where He was and if He even cared about me. I was slowly broken down and stripped of all pride, indignity, and desires. Only when I was completely broken and able to humble myself at the throne of God and […]

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Crawling out of the Black Hole of Despair

There are times when we are hurting when we feel as if we’ve climbed into a black hole of despair we cannot climb out of. Our present circumstances have overtaken us and we feel caught and stuck. No matter where we turn, there seems no way to climb out from this abyss. I have personally been there on more than […]

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A Caring Friend

There are so many times when we are hurting that we want to pour out our heart.  We seem to tell anyone and everyone that will listen about our troubles and woes. I’ve been guilty of that and I’ve seen it happen in others, even when the situation was not appropriate. We all need a caring friend to listen, comfort […]

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My Tribute to Billy Graham

  Rain beat down on us that spring evening in 1987, but we did not care.  We opened our umbrellas and held them high.  Nothing would deter us from having the opportunity to sit in the choir bleachers at Williams Brice Stadium for those eight evenings Billy Graham was holding his crusades. We arrived early each evening, as Cliff Barrow […]

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The True Cost of Friendship

  We’ve all heard the old saying “keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” There are relationships in which I would have been saved a lot of heartache if I’d listened to that inner voice and the warning it provided. True friends stay by us no matter what we are going through.  Often when we are going through a […]

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Serving Others

  When we are hurting, it is so easy to get caught up in our own web of pity, despair, selfishness and one track thinking. However, one of the best ways to get out of our own funk, is to reach out and help others.  When we help others, we end up feeling better about ourselves and even at times […]

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Setting Healthy Boundaries

  I have a person close to me that frustrates me at times and I wonder if I’m being taken advantaged of. Sometimes it’s difficult to understand if the request are just easier for the individual or if I’m being taken advantage of. In all relationships, it is important to set healthy boundaries. This includes: Knowing what I am/am not […]

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When Others Hurt

    I recently had a young woman enter my life for a very short time.  On the outside, she was bubbly and outgoing. But, then I noticed the scars on her arms where she had been cutting herself.  I wondered about the wounds that drove her to such a drastic action. I thought back to the times when my […]

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Praying for others

Recently, I had a very strong desire to pray for a loved one. I knew of some difficult times this individual was going through, but not the exact circumstances in that moment.  I may never know, but God knows.  The Lord used me as a vessel to pray and intercede for this loved one when he may not have been […]

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A Roadmap for the New Year

    Often it is difficult to see over our present horizon.  But, we have just embarked on a new year and with it arrive new hopes and new goals. Even if the world seems dark at the moment, we hope that by the end of this year, it will not feel quite so desolate. I recently heard Denzel Washington […]

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Salt in the Wound

  There are individuals that I love dearly, but often spending time together is the same as pouring salt in the wound. My heart is reminded of all that I do not have and long for and the pain wells up inside, screaming to be released. I find myself pouring my heart out to the Lord, knowing that I cannot […]

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Pain Behind the Smile

  There are times when I put on a bright smile, but inside my heart is breaking. This has happened more times than I can name through a variety of situations. When others ask how we are it is so easy to say “fine” without truly answering. However, we all need that one or two close friends that we can […]

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