Rebel to Redeemed…Sharing HIS Kind of Love
Now the hard work began, I had to learn to be honest. Both with myself and with others. I wanted healing to be instantaneous but it wasn’t. Healing takes a lot of time and a lot of work. There were numerous layers that had to be pulled back. Often, I felt that I’d learned one lesson or worked through one […]
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I was hurting and in pain and wanted to disappear into the depth of depression and darkness that encompassed my heart. Yet, I had to move forward. I could not stay in this holding spot forever. But how did I begin to heal? I wasn’t able to do it on my own. I also knew that I did not want […]
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After three years in an abusive relationship and twenty years of bad decisions, I’d come to the end of myself. I was broken and depressed. I was grieving over all that had happened. I’d been wronged time and time again. However, I began to realize that while I’d been wronged, I’d also done wrong. I wasn’t perfect and made plenty […]
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The relationship with Duncan finally came to an end. I was relieved, but also left broken and hurt. The grieving process followed, which only enhanced my depression. I didn’t want to do anything and I didn’t want to discuss what had happened. I was so embarrassed by all I’d endured. I was happiest in a darkened room where I was […]
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“You’re stupid,” I’d heard that and numerous other put downs over the years of domestic violence. So much so that I began to believe it. Anything I did something that internal voice would whisper “You’re stupid” or “I can’t believe you’re so dumb.” That voice plaque me and continued to keep me down. My self-esteem and self-confidence were so eroded […]
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Last week I shared the risk factors of suicide. This week I want to share the warning signs for you. A sudden switch from being very sad to being very calm or appearing to be happy Always talking or thinking about death Clinical depression (deep sadness, loss of interest, trouble sleeping and eating) that gets worse Having a “death wish,” […]
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I’ve been sharing my own struggles with depression and even how I was stopped from a suicide attempt. So what are some risk factors of suicide? One or more prior suicide attempts Family history of mental disorder or substance abuse Family history of suicide Family violence Physical or sexual abuse Keeping firearms in the home Chronic physical illness, including chronic […]
Read more I’ve shared my own struggles with suicide and easing the pain I felt. The world was shocked in August 2014, when it was revealed that comedian Robin Williams death was a result of suicide. Often loved ones do not even realize that someone they love is contemplating or planning to commit suicide. Actually, people that have decided on such an […]
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I’d given up on life in those years of living in domestic violence. Inside I was dead. So much so that I’d formulated a plan to take my life. One day, I was fired after missing work for doctor appointments and counseling sessions over the last few months. Great, I’ve got just enough money to check into that hotel across […]
Read more Life did not matter anymore. After a suicide attempt, I shut down even more than I had already. I became a shell of a person. In the mean time I went through the motions of my day to day routine, but there was no feeling or emotion. When a spark of life did ignite, Duncan was quick to squelch that […]
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As my relationship deteriorated, my depression increased. I grew to a point that I felt hopeless and overwhelmed. I had no idea how I was going to get out of this situation. There were numerous mind games that I was not emotionally or mentally equipped to deal with the emotional roller coaster I was on. Nothing I did seemed to […]
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I’ve shared my story of domestic violence and rebellion already on here. These decisions did not help my already precarious situation. There are a handful of good moments in my relationship with Duncan, but these are overshadowed by all of the bad times. The euphoria of love hung in the air in the beginning. However, there were a number of […]
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I’m taking a break from my story, to share some signs of depression. How do you know if you or someone you love are depressed or just a little blue? Have you dealt with any of the following signs? Memory loss Headaches Crying spells Low self-confidence/self esteem Mood changes Feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, helplessness Thoughts of suicide Difficulty concentrating Self-pity […]
Read moreWe all have moments when we are down or blue. What are some of the types of depression people struggle with? Major depression—must have severe symptoms that affect your day to day life Manic depression—mood swings that have extreme lows and highs Adjustment disorder—severe emotional disorder to difficult or traumatic events in life Dysthymia—more chronic form of depressions Postpartum depression—after […]
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After I saw the negative health effects lithium had on my body, I resisted taking medicine for my depression. At the time of my initial diagnosis, most of my family were also against medication. This changed a few years later as we all dealt with Daddy’s struggle with cancer. When we saw how medication helped Daddy with his lifelong battle, […]
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Depression runs in my family. We all have that strongly dominate melancholy gene. I loved Daddy greatly, but his mood swings growing up often took a toll on the family. One moment he could be in a good mood, but when he awoke from a nap he was in a bad mood. Now, my struggle with depression was on display […]
Read more The summer after high school were wrought with bad choices. I moved out of my parents for a short period of time. However, the conditions were less than ideal. I returned home in time to attend college, as we’d planned. I was so excited to have my freedom, but being three hours away from everyone I knew and loved was […]
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By my senior year in high school, I had trouble expressing my feelings and emotions. I was overwhelmed with all of the changes taking place in my life. At that time, my family did not really discuss deep emotional issues. I had no idea how to express to myself, more or less to someone else. Instead of opening up and […]
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Depression has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. For years I thought something was wrong with me because I had a perpetual state of sadness that seemed to hang over me. However, a better understanding of personalities helps me to understand that melancholy is my dominant personality state. This is part of my […]
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Today we start another life application series. After discussing domestic violence and the Prodigal life, we delve into another difficult subject. Depression. Depression has often been a taboo subject in our culture and society. After all this was not a disease that people could see or touch. This was a “mental” disease and individuals suffering with depression were often deemed […]
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